Day 70: 293 lbs

I gained two pounds since yesterday.

This is really getting silly. I don't know how or why, but my diet has really gone off the rails. Even though I'm tracking calories, etc., etc., I'm not losing any weight. It has now been almost five weeks since I've actually lost any weight.

Despite the usual excuses--and I do know that I'm gaining muscle, and the past week my body has been retaining water (I know this because my wedding ring has gotten hard to remove)--I think I have to take stock and go back to square one.

I'm really pleased that I've lost about 25 lbs. Clap clap clap yay for me. But that's only a fraction of my goal. So here are...

The Diet Commandments

1. Thou Shalt Log Every Item Of Nourishment Which Enters Thy Mouth
   1. Diet Soda and Water Doth Not Count
   2. Coffee Doth Not Count, Unless Coffee Hath Been Adulterated with Cream and/or Sugar
   3. Fresh Garden Vegetables Doth Not Count, but Dip is Abhorrent To Thee
2. Thou Shalt Measure Thine Portions Accurately, or Eat Premeasured Portions
   1. If Measuring be Impossible, Thou Shalt Take Thine Best Guess, but Only as a Last Resort
3. Thou Shalt Consume No More Than 1,500 Calories Each Day
4. Thou Shalt Weigh Thyself Each and Every Morning
   1. Each Weighing Shalt Be On The Same Scale to Ensure Consistency of Thine Weight
   2. Thou Shalt Weigh Thyself After Emptying Thy Bowels and Bladder and Before Filling Thy Stomach
   3. Thou Shalt Not Stand on One Foot, Shift Thy Weight, or Tilt Thyself Front, Back, or Sideways to Measure a Lesser Weight
   4. If Thou Findest Thyself Away from Home, Thou Mayest Skippeth Thy Daily Weighing
5. Thou Shalt Record Thy Weight Daily in Thy Diet Computer, and Upon Thy Blog
6. Thou Shalt Honor These Rules Always, and Confess Any Weakness Upon Thy Blog

It occurs to me that Moses would have been in big trouble if God had decided to provide clarifying points to the ten commandments.